In this inaugural episode of FILM HAGS, the hags introduce themselves to the world and announce this season's theme of movies they'll be basing their weekly picks on. Maggie was lucky number one and got to pick our VERY FIRST movie. She went with one of the most rewatchable rom coms(?) ever—My Big Fat Greek Wedding! You'll also hear the hags' first childhood movie memories and what movies they refuse to cover on this podcast (drama ensues). FILM HAGS is a TAPEDECK podcast, along with our friends at 70mm, Cinenauts, Dune Pod, BAT & SPIDER, Will Run For... and Lost Light. Check out any of these pods if you love creative and fun people talkin' bout things they love! Want to get in touch with the hags? Email filmhags@gmail.com or follow them on Instagram & Twitter where you'll get to see Mel's beautiful episode art every week. You can find this episode's full transcript here and if you have any feedback on other ways we can be making this podcast as accessible as possible, we'd love to hear from you.
In this inaugural episode of FILM HAGS, the hags introduce themselves to the world and announce this season's theme of movies they'll be basing their weekly picks on.
Maggie was lucky number one and got to pick our VERY FIRST movie. She went with one of the most rewatchable rom coms(?) ever—My Big Fat Greek Wedding!
You'll also hear the hags' first childhood movie memories and what movies they refuse to cover on this podcast (drama ensues).
FILM HAGS is a TAPEDECK podcast, along with our friends at 70mm, Cinenauts, Dune Pod, BAT & SPIDER, Will Run For... and Lost Light. Check out any of these pods if you love creative and fun people talkin' bout things they love!
Want to get in touch with the hags? Email filmhags@gmail.com or follow them on Instagram & Twitter where you'll get to see Mel's beautiful episode art every week.
You can find this episode's full transcript here and if you have any feedback on other ways we can be making this podcast as accessible as possible, we'd love to hear from you.
[tape recorder sounds play] This, this, this is a TAPEDECK Podcast.
[FILM HAGS theme song plays alone, fades out]
BOOM Hello and welcome to the very first episode of FILM HAGS. We are just four haggy friends and each week we will be burning up some hot takes and opinions on movie. I'm Boom, you can also call me Jess or Jessica—if we're in business together or you're mad at me. [Sophie & Mel & Boom laugh] And I'm joined by Maggie, Sophie and Mel. How are you all doing?!
MAGGIE Wonderful Jessica!
MEL So good.
SOPH So. Good.
BOOM We did it!
SOPH We are here. We made it. It's been a long time coming. There's been some ups and downs, but we are here we made it, baby! [Boom laughs]
MEL The curse has lifted.
BOOM So you're probably asking yourselves how four beautiful talented intelligent young women could possibly self identify as hags, you know, traditionally hag is a term used to identify an old, decrepit, vile woman and to that we say it's not a your business what anybody chooses to identify as! [Sophie laughs] But!
MEL Yeah! [Boom laughs]
BOOM We are choosing to make it your business and let you know that we are reclaiming the hag okay?!
MAGGIE Not that there's anything wrong with OG hags. We love all hags.
BOOM All hags are awesome. Listen! [Boom laughs]
SOPH But we're just taking the hag name and you know, making it something we want it to be and reclaiming it as movie loving people.
BOOM Exactly!
MEL That don't give a fuck.
SOPH Don't give a fuck.
BOOM Don't give a fuck. We aren't hanging our likability on being lady like or proper. We do and say what we want. And right now we want to take up some space in the world of movie podcasts! So hags, why don't we introduce ourselves? Tell everybody who you are, where you from, and what are your first movie memories?
MAGGIE Okay, I am Maggie. I'm from Toronto. Three of the four of us are from Toronto and Mel is here to keep us Canadians in check. I don't know, I've always had a hard time when people are like, what's your earliest memory of this? And I don't really understand how people can say like, yes, my earliest memory was this thing. But probably my earliest movie memory was Princess Bride. I remember the year that the animated Mulan came out that like at my birthday, I got the choice of whether or not we could watch Mulan or Princess Bride—
SOPH Oh no.
MAGGIE At my birthday party and like all attendees of my birthday party wanted to watch Mulan. But I wanted to watch Princess Bride with my sister. Like we both want to watch it and no one had fun except for my sister and I. [Boom laughs] And because we love the movie so much, and we'd seen it a million times. And it's great. Honestly, I wish I picked that one for my first burden into your brain. [Maggie laughs]
BOOM Oh damn!
MAGGIE But instead went with the always classic Big Fat Greek Wedding.
SOPH No, no regrets here. No regrets. We just pick a movie that comes to mind and we go with it.
MAGGIE I didn't really remember or realize that because I was picking this movie. It meant that like we all had to watch it. [Boom & Mel laugh] Which is like so obvious to me. But like, when I was watching My Big Fat Greek Wedding. I was like god damn, I didn't think that I would ever watch this movie again in my entire life. Anyway, that's me!
SOPH I like the pick. I'm stoked about this pick.
BOOM Okay, Sophie, you go.
SOPH Okay, I'm Sophie. I'm also a Torontonian. Love movies. I love talking to my friends about movies. Like Maggie, I feel like it's hard for me to like think of my first movie experience. But I did grow up watching a shit ton of movies. I remember having this like massive shelf of VHS movies. And now that think about it I think a lot of it had to do with I watched a lot of movies with my dad. I feel like it was kind of like a bonding experience that we had. He would kind of play video games with my brother and watch movies that were probably I was probably, I was probably a little too young to be watching, but he just kind of wanted to like bond with his daughter I guess?
MAGGIE Okay, what spicy movie did Andy make you watch?
SOPH So I have this extremely distinct memory of watching The Blair Witch Project.
MEL Oh my God!
BOOM OH no.
SOPH When I was literally like, I must have been like, like under 10 years old, and—
MEL Jesus.
SOPH And I can't remember every single scene of that movie for some reason. I haven't revisited since I think I first watched it, but for some reason I feel like I know every part of it. Like this one scene where they like, find where the witch is, and—
MEL I've never seen it.
SOPH Oh! Okay. You know what? Maybe I'll save it because it honestly is burned into my brain.
BOOM Oh, no.
MAGGIE I've never seen that movie, but I know how it ends.
SOPH Oh, you know that final scene with the guy in the corner? [Boom gasps]
MAGGIE Yeah, I feel like a lot of people have like, are specifically scarred by the final scene of that movie.
SOPH What, Boom, did you just remember the guy in the corner? [Sophie laughs]
MEL Are you okay Boom?
BOOM No, I've never seen it. My mother knew better. And she knew to ban me from watching it because I am very scared, I was very scared nervous child. But you just describing that, like gave me chills and I'm probably not going to sleep tonight.
SOPH Okay, I barely described it.
MAGGIE She barely described it! [Boom & Maggie laugh]
BOOM Anything that involves lurking in a corner is not for me!
MAGGIE Honestly, did you even say that? Or did you just say 'and then they find this house?'
BOOM No, she said there was a guy lurking in the corner.
MAGGIE Yeah, but even that.
BOOM Ugh!
MAGGIE Is that weird?
BOOM Yeah, it's terrifying.
MEL If we're gonna get a cabin for first hag hang, then we should watch Blair Witch Project. [Mel laughs]
BOOM Absolutely not.
SOPH Well, this is the thing! Like I feel like The Blair Witch Project legitimately kind of fucked me up because I actually have a pretty massive fear of the woods now and like getting lost in the woods. Like I can go to like cottage trips or whatever. But I will be thinking about The Blair Witch or not even The Blair Witch. I'll be thinking about someone murdering me in the woods.
MAGGIE When you're sleeping in the woods, aren't you just like the only thing stopping me from getting killed is the will to not murder?! [Sophie laughs]
BOOM I was just to say that. Mel, just a quick story for listeners and Mel. This summer, we went to a cottage for a week. And Sophie was expressing to Maggie that she was kind of nervous about the fact that her bed was right beside the window that looked into the woods. And Maggie, in an attempt to comfort her said, "Yeah, you know what, like, the only thing keeping somebody from murdering you is like the will not to murder." [Sophie & Mel laugh] So naturally, that soothed her weary soul. [Boom laughs]
MAGGIE Honestly, I wasn't trying to sooth, I was trying to relate because I was also afraid.
SOPH It was literally the worst thing you could have told me in that moment. [Boom & Mel & Maggie laugh]
MEL Amazing.
SOPH Yes, that's my earliest childhood movie experience, I guess. And it makes sense. I don't know. I was a weird kid.
MAGGIE You know, in your father's defense. [Mel & Boom laugh] I think—you're not scared, like you can watch scary movies and it doesn't ruin your life. Which is amazing. And I'm jealous of that. And like, yeah, it's probably because you started watching them at a young age.
SOPH No, yeah, you're right. Like, I've never been that scared to watch scary movies or anything. But it comes with the mental trauma. So that's fun.
MEL I wasn't allowed to watch PG-13 movies till I was 13 so...
SOPH Oh they really followed the rules!
MEL So I have a low tolerance.
MAGGIE Wowww. [Maggie laughs]
MEL But my sister got to when I turned 13, which is not fair.
SOPH What was your first PG-13 movie?
MEL Mrs. Doubtfire. [Mel & Boom laugh] Wait, unless, wait is Jurassic Park, was Jurassic Park PG-13?
SOPH Probably not for like sexy things. But for... scary?
MEL Because that is burned into my brain because my dad, that's like one of the first movies I remember watching with him, was just the two of us and he rented it. And that scene where the T-rex like—
SOPH Oh, yeah.
MEL Eats the guy off the toilet is seared into my brain. [Mel laughs]
BOOM It's probably how I'm gonna go to be honest. [Soph & Mel laugh]
SOPH T-rex to the face. [Boom laughs]
MEL Hopefully that's how we all go.
SOPH Yeah, I'd go, I'd go at Jurassic Park. That's fucking dope.
MAGGIE You know what's weird about that scene? Is like, did the guy go into the bathroom before they saw the dinosaur? Or did he run in for refuge and then think you know what? Now's a good time as any! [Soph laughs] I gotta do this.
MEL He saw the dinosaur and he had explosive diarrhea. [Mel & Maggie laugh]
BOOM It checks out.
SOPH Also, I feel like Jurassic Park might be something that we cover in the future? So why don't we just... table that.
MAGGIE You're right.
BOOM Okay, Mel, hit us up. Tell us where you from, girl.
MEL So I am the only United States citizen on this podcast. [Mel laughs] I'm from Massachusetts.
SOPH I like how you're avoiding saying American.
MAGGIE Also the way you said citizen made it all sound like we were potentially illegally living in the States. [Mel laughs]
MEL You guys are all actually living in my basement right now legally.
SOPH & MAGGIE I wish!
SOPH Jinx!
MAGGIE Don't tease us. Wish we were lurking in the corners of your basement! [Sophie laughs]
MEL Oh god!
BOOM Ugh.
MEL No thank you! Yeah, so I'm from Massachusetts. I'm a Masshole, as they say.
SOPH Excuse me?! [Mel laughs]
BOOM I love that.
MAGGIE Clearly Sophie is not 'they'. [Boom & Mel laugh]
SOPH Wait, can we all try and say Ma...Ma—I can't say it.
BOOM Massatussis. [Mel laughs]
MAGGIE Massachusetts!
MEL Massachushits.
SOPH Ma...Mass...Massachu—[Sophie laughs] I literally can't! [Mel laughs] So Mel, I don't know if we can be friends.
MEL I'll give you lessons. Just call, just say Masshole.
SOPH Masshole! Yeah, she's from the ol' Masshole! I don't know what that was. [Maggie & Soph laugh]
BOOM That's hot.
MEL And what else? Oh, I'm a cartoonist. For the rest of my day is what I do. And I watch movies and I talk to my hags.
SOPH Yeah, you do! [Boom laughs]